Tuesday, January 31, 2006 

meeting the neighbour

so chris (that's my landlady's daughter) saunter across the road to introduce me to the neighbours and get a couple of dvd's. i meet scott and the door with their bouncy dog, kojo. what is it with makhiwas and dogs - really? anyhoo, scott starts searching for the dvd's while his wife shona screams from the kitchen. scott yells back at her that he cant find any movies. shona dives into the room. she lies in a stomach and begins digging at the back of the cabinet. she's wearing a really short mini and black stockings - the edge of her ass is almost visible. she hasn't noticed that we are also in the room. chris and i stand well back by the door and just watch the live show.

then chris says, "nice ass, shona!"

shona bounces up, with her back to us, proceeds to lift her skirt up and wiggles her behind and adds, "you like my pants too?"

our jaws drop, scott turns red and says to his wife, "honey, this is our new neighbour."

shona gasps, "oh my god, i didn't realise you were there."

too late woman!

me calmly replies, "it's a pleasure to meet you."

absolooooootely priceless!

Monday, January 30, 2006 

dog's day

i got home on friday to be greeted by a new dog, poppy. i was introduced to poppy, supposedly a sweet, fun-loving, people-centric, gentle dog. we were dog-sitting her for a friend. okay fair enough.

the next day, she broke down the back fence and took off, never to be seen again. i really don't know whether to be happy or sad.

 

what we want to hear

i miss my uncle in sac. he has a notorious habit of telling it like it is. take these two incidences i personally witnessed during the christmas haolidays.

1. beauty is the beast
that christmas party we went to a mother ago. we met this extremely ugly woman. usually, you just smile back and quietly keep it to yourself. but not this guy! when this facially challenged lady left the room, he quips louded to everyone [at least 6 peeps in room], "that woman is ugly. how did that guy marry her?"

2. sharing the khisimusi spirit
this guy who goes by the name tom graced his presence at the same christmas party at a friend's house. tom, who is often smelled and not heard, went on to greet everyone with a hug. [it was my 1st time meeting this guy]. anyhoo, when he gets to ol' faithful, he [my uncle] snaps,"no no no, tom, you stink!" he cowered away into his little corner for the rest of the evening.

there really is no harm with sharing the truth. is there?

Saturday, January 28, 2006 

dogwatch

either angel has been fixed or she got sponsored by kotex. megan and i were bonding this morning. however i disinfected my hands before i left.

 

increase the temperature

so last night after work i decide to go on my ace missions. i dont know anyone in this town besides the people i live with and their "lovely" dogs. i didnt bother going home to change and ventured into this place called fahrenheit ultra lounge in a suit carrying a black bag and a wall street journal clamped under my left armpit. if anything (with the foreign accent and look added), that was bound to get me some female attention.

before i continue, i must confess my love for beautiful spaces created for the young adult with plenty class and excellent taste, i.e. moi!

i was greeted a fresh looking darling (dressed as if she had just walked out of The Matrix). she lead me into this bar lounge - exquisitely decked out with comfy mood seating and lights, an attractive bar and music - house music. i had found my second home. after interrogating the barman - who owns it? what sort of crowd? is there cover at the weekend? and the music? what about the menu? and happy hour? closing time? - i got the answers i was looking for. i will not lead a miserable life while i'm here. at least some of these hitech geeks have lives after all.

i settle into my seat, decide on a long beach cocktail and my phone rings almost immediately. this kid in new york asking about my new job. i realised that i was in time for happy hour - which actually lasted three hours - and so there was no going home after just one drink. midway through my second drink, the barman introduces me to the editor of THE entertainment magazine in the valley. whoopie ding - free tickets - to EVERYTHING. so i latch on (typical zimbo) and the drinks just flow. anyhoo, i got home early enough - by 10pm. i had a job to go the next day!

Friday, January 27, 2006 

i dont know what you heard about me

i may not drive a cadillac or wear a perm and i aint no g fo shizzle but a bitch sure cant get a crumb out of me.

[this goes out as a warning to all young smartly dressed young men. there are people out there after you. i shall try my best to hood-arize this, here goes]

ah wuz waiting fo' da train jus' like Orenthawl James. dis here wuz at da station (and git Sheniquah's ass back ova' heeah.) dis here `64 rolls up ta me. da negroid mo'fo' inside points ta da ho sitting next ta him and sez to me, "what 'chew thinking man? ya iz all dressed up, w0rd! what iz you doin'?"

me replies, sounding polished as always, "i'm waiting for the train. how can i help you?"

"dis here beeotch needs her ass tapped. ya iz uh fine looking gentlemen wiff some spare change. ah'm sure ya could he`p uh brudda an' sister out. and shit. "

"in what possible way?"

at dis here point, da ho starts smiling an' winking an dat boil on mah ass. she wuz really pimp-tight looking too, all natural wiff her fro decent an' all, nice makeup you know das right!. what we's had wuz uh pimp an' one o' his ho' in the hood.

"i'm really sorry. i'm on a short a break and besides, this is not my kind of thing."

"it don' gots ta be long my bro."

"i am flattered, thanks but no thanks."


all ya brothers out dere watch out, ya' know what i'm sayin'?

 

skid marks

the clock ticks 49:57.02 (at the last freeze). i shall type choppers. 49 minutes!

last night, i get home, my newly found home. i unpack my stuff (i hadn't bothered when i'd moved in - was busy with my nozaring missions!). i get changed into my white lounge pants which i quite like - nice just to hang about in. i must admit that i'm one guy with a pretty cool dress sense, even locked up indoors. i decide to bit more chatting and sort of play megan - that's one of the dogs.

[hang on let me back track a bit - go back two years, location: some street in sutton, surrey. what happens? i witmess a m'khiwa gogo wipe her dog's arse. me thinks: let the dog lick itself, stupid cow!]

back to last night. i'm playing with megan in my white pants which chatting to B (my landlady) and she (the dog) does a funny twirl and leaves a skid mark on my pants. this is only day two with these animals and they are soiling my clothes with their shit. i thought angel (that's the other bitch) was bad enough on a constant period leaving puddles of blood on the kitchen floor - somebody please get the poor dog tampax. i now realise that that old gogo was no stupid cow. she prob'ly had had many episodes of skid marks on all things the dog's arse came in contact with.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006 

sanity reigns in

i've moved into this lovely home with a very sane couple. they made me chicken pot pie last night (which is giving me wind!) and looking forward to a happy stay with them. they have live-in dogs but i'm really not fussed. it's about time i learnt to put with the darn things indoors as part of my salala-rization. one of the dogs, though, was leaking blood from its behind. she's getting it fixed.

so off to work i go today. form filling after form filling, contract after contract, page after page, book after book. the only consololation was that the clock with ticking, the shift was moving and i was getting paid to do it! then, it was taking it all in - in a day!! there's just too much. however i've gone through two financial products and have some homework to go through. it looks promising.

apart from that, i feel like i've joined the real working force - i seem to matter in people eyes and when i get on that commuter tram i look and feel just as important as the guy sitting next to me. yes please! i've got the cool accent to go with it too. the girls at work love it, hence my free lunch! i should keep it up. the downer is that i am seated in the biggest library west of the missisippi (how d'ya spell it?) typing away at break fingernail speed before my time slot runs out. 4:46:01 left. gotta check my mail!

Tuesday, January 24, 2006 

quest

as i come to terms with the fact that i will be abandoning a beautiful modern home with central air, own bathroom, cable tv in my room, big screen tv downstairs, high speed internet, pantry at my disposal, fridge to raid and a car parked in the garage, my quest for a room to board has ended. suddenly i feel like i've beeen brought down to size and will have to put up with sharing bathrooms and kitchens with strangers. i mention these two as in any house, they are the two roms i am really particular about. who really wants to catch a dump in a shitty toilet and who would want to eat food from a dirty counter.

my quest has been somewhat eventful. i came across some really really REALLY wierd people.

1. the lonely girl
miss bizzare interviewed me over the phone to be a roomate of hers. she wanted me to massage her 3 times a week, walk in my underwear when i got home from work everynight. accompany her shopping and bar hopping twice a month among other things all for a mere $200 reduction in the rent.

2. the lonely guy
i really ought to introduce him to miss bizzare. basically, he wants somebody, male or female, to his friend for only $20 a month. that's it. he will cover al expenses, i.e. food, transport, shopping trips. this would include weekend holiday breaks, hiking trips and skiing. but you have to sleep in the same room - same bed!

3. bi-sexual naturist
a bi advetising exec with a huge house who is renting out a room for a fraction of the cost. one must be open minded and expect him to walk around in the nude, especially when he is on his way to the hot-tub across the front room. entertainment for your guests when they come over.

4. vegan with body odour
she wants you to cook food that is on a specified list. it must not be processed, be fresh but not picked. plants and fruits have feelings - they radiate an energy - and hence must die a natural death. you must also use all things natural. no fragrances, no soap, no shampoo, no cleaning agents, no tv. basically, just crawl into her cave and simply exist.

5. swinging in the family
this sister and brother duo have a pleasant family house in the valley. they have eight dogs, an aviary and a couple of cats. she's in her 50's and he's in his 40's but he's "a bit slow" and weighs 280 pounds. now read this carefully. they dont really work. they run a family business. every friday and saturday night they have adult entertainment parties for couples. couples only, no singletons. at precisely 9pm, the curtains and blinds are shut, the front door is locked and the telephone is unplugged. he puts on the porn video, while she dishes out the condoms. once everyone gets in the mood, coitus follows before they switch partners and end up with big happy orgy. no to worry about the mess - while everyone's at play, she runs around armed with bleach spray and a sponge disinfecting everything, including the door knobs (just in case they have a virus!). they make a thousand bucks a week easy!

Sunday, January 22, 2006 

kwaito

there is something defining about this musical genre. it is very unique. the slower tempo and the additionally melodious and percussive african bits define its true sense. the vocals, not sung, not rapped are shouted to send a strong message. this is who we are. and this isn't just music. it's a lifestyle, a validation of a way of life - the way we dress, talk and dance. this is where art-form meets life. embrace it before it passes you by!

 

friday

i never did watch that movie friday. i should look for the dvd. or rather, i should have made my own dvd. yesterday was another disaster. maybe i should tell.

so wil flies in from texas. he's staying with sims. he's also from zim so my expectations of carnage were very true. in fact before friday even happened, they dragged me out the day before. maybe i shouldn't use the word drag because i got myself onto the guestlist at avalon - just in case! kept my options open. so there was no fuss. after all this is my last weekend here before venturing into the bay for my new job.

i will not discuss thursday (this entry is called friday). it was another one of those stupid nights out. so here's friday.

8:14 opening garage door opening wakes me up. it's the professor back from the gym. how do middle-aged people manage to keep such rigid work-life cycles? anyway, flip the telly on. there's a whale in the thames. great!

8:43 that shower was sooo good. late nights/early mornings aren't good. cd's on finest train. practice s'gubhu moves in front of mirror. but why am dancing in my boxers?

9:02 sims and wil are here. we went out together last night and they are here already. so they chat to the prof while i make my brekky. bacon and this bread made from amabele which this dude made. it's good

about 10:30 we decide to have a barbeque at sims's mom's house. pile into the car and venture southwards.

11:03 at this chinese supermarket buying meat. the beef is right next to the purple squid. GREAT. stock up on drinks - well corona, bourbon whiskey and remi martin.

12:30 get to the crib. lazying about. start the fire.

thereafter i lost track of time. it goes quick when you are enjoy yourself, esp when sipping something in form of a mexican beer or a french cognac. goodness. stories galore about life back in zim and trying to put nobs' boyfriend into the picture. it's very hard to describe what we africans really went through. he on the other hand had his stories from the 'hood'.

there was the one where his dad would send him next door to 'borrow' some sugar from mrs james. some days later it would be two eggs, some salt and cooking oil. may sound funny but i can imagine the same thing happening in zim. people have one common denominator - and somehow we just need to find it.

 

verbatim et literatim

i spent today alone. i spend to much time by myself and i wonder if i'm really normal. maybe i just like my space and prefer not to have it invaded when i choose. i find myself so far from people i really know and being lost in oblivious thought calms me down. puts my mind at ease.

i've been contemplating going back to my old self - writer of all things in prose and poetry. i somehow feel as though since moving from home, i've lost that connection with my creative self. life has become a constant "crash" moment and i dont reflect on it like i used to. i express myself in written letters and words. unlike speaking your mind out freely, a lot more thought goes into the written process and there's little risk of saying the wrong thing.

i see a lot of faces but i dont hear a lot of voices. i should stick my ears out there and listen and not just watch but see. maybe then i'll be able to take life more verbatim et literatim.

 

a million little what?

i was in a bookstore and i found myself at the checkout buying that book by james frey: a million little pieces. subject to so much controvesy, is it truth or is it fiction? to be honest, not many books i pick up get a grip of me in the first twenty-three pages.

so i will find myself poring through a million little letters over the next million little seconds.

Thursday, January 19, 2006 

waiting for the train

now because i was begging for a job to the late night hours, i only got to the station at 10.39pm. i know the time coz that's when i bought my ticket. got chatting with this guy and girl there. she had just got back from vegas and he had just picked up his new laptop and was moving to norway. i had stories to share about my job - even to complete strangers. anyway, the dude, E brought out a shedule and the girl, J and i figured it out. turned that last train had departed at 1030pm. so there we were at some obsure train station - stranded!

J decides we go to a bar. clever girl. so we saunter to the bawa. we stop at the buses to ask if there is any way we can get out of this town at 1120pm. the lovely bus driver lady, informs us of the no 22 which goes towards san francisco and goes ahead and gives us free bus passes. so we shelve the bar idea but J has another one up her sleeve. she brings out this bottle of vodka and says, "guys we need a chaser!" E, who had a bike, gets on his bike and dashes to nearest bar. he gets back, not with fruit juice but with cider - 6% cider to chase cheap vodka.

what the hell, it should do. J does the mixing. this girl knows her stuff pretty well. anyhoo, we start entertaining our poor souls before getting on the no 22. we move to the back of bus - we dont want to risk being chucked out for breaking state and federal law. 10 minutes into the bus, we decide to find out where exactly this bus is going. it turns out it's only going to palo alto - not even half way. J tells us it's cool. we'll get there in time for last drinks at ruby's - this girl knows her shee.

so we get to ruby's - no plan in mind and we have more than just last drinks. E is now totally trashed and is falling over. the blonde girl, blue eyes, thin as a rack, hijacks me at the bar and introducs herself - only thing is that i cant remember her name. anyhoo, she tells me that she went to college in chico which is the no 1 party college according to playboy magazine. wow, i really needed to know that. she is soooo drunk and is hitting on me like a love sick barbie. i eventually move on to my new found friends, have a toast to my new job beforebeing thrown out into the street.

no plan in mind, we decide to hijack a taxi while J gets on the phone and wakes up her friends. see who can pick us up!! we manage to put the bike into the trunk of the taxi and order the driver to drive towards san francisco. he's from east africa and so he complies. however, J has managed to get one old friend to pick us up from the freeway and so the taxi ride ends quickly. so, there we were, outside the four seasons hotel at 3am.

friend arrives. for the life of me i cant remember his name. i fall asleep the second i sit down. next thing i wake up and we're in SF. he drove us all the way there! E kindly let me sleep on his living room floor. so much for a new job!

 

now it does get hi-tech

so i went to check out this cool company in silicon valley, got chatting to people, used all the charm i could master, spoke impeccably british and i got hired on the spot. in fact, i'm really proud of the fact that i was the first they hired out of fifty. ergo, i get full bragging rights but i must work three times as hard. there i wont be shy. i also want a slice of the $300 billion worth of the company.

being in the valley will be cool. but being neighbours with steve jobs, larry page and sergey brin simply means that rent will be over the roof. it will be a cool experience being in this pretty hi-tech village for next six months or so.

that stupid company which tried to lure is still pestering me with phone calls. for goodness sake, just let it rest. i aint gonna work for your sorry asses.

Monday, January 16, 2006 

hi-tech, my foot

i should sue! why do people pretend they are something, lure you in and then pitch something completely different.

i got this call today from some guy called Charles. he introduced himself as a recruiter who was looking for computer saavy individuals with good people skills to join their expanding hi-tech company. so me thinks, sounds good. and the company's not too far from intel and so there may be something in this. me doesn't ask: what's the name of the company; how much do i get paid; and what does the job entail? i think i have become so desp'rate, i could take any offer.

me goes there, today, yes on a sunday. i should have smelt a rat but i didn't! i was all togged up, suit, tie, polished shoes, clean shaven, combed hair.... get to this shoddy office [in a nice office block] to be greeted by Charles [let's call him Chuck!] who must be about 4 feet tall, thin as a rack and looked as though he was from the east asian mafia. that guy gave me the creeps. he then invited me to meet his big boss, a bulky east asian dude who can barely breath. maybe this is the mafia. my biased self at this point became really skeptical [i watched CRASH last night and you that scene when they find a bunch of chinese peeps being smuggled and sold into the country - it sure felt like i was in the middle of it]

they then go on to describe how they make their money - selling mortgages. now, that's hi-tech, unless of course i'm lost in translation. me asks, so where's the hi-tech twist in selling mortgages? well, it's all in your brain. now i'm really lost. then,

me: so how would i go about selling the mortgage?
them: we dont really sell. we educate people about how to save money on their mortgages.
me: and how do you educate them?
them: we give you the necessary tools when you sign up.
me: and what are those tools?
them: we tell them to you when you sign up.
me: so how much do i get paid?
them: it depends on the volume of work you do.
me: so what's volume of work?
them: say you sell a $500,000 mortgage to a person...
me: hang on. where will i find somebody willing to spend half a mill?
them: on the street. there's lots of people waiting for you to educate them.
me: so that lady on the street could need a half a mill mortgage.
them: now you are getting the idea.
me: so i basically just walk around town asking people if they need a new home.
them: ooh yes, they are everywhere, bus stops, shopping malls, starbucks...
me: hypothetically, i could ask someone if they needed a house with their latte...
them: (chuckles) yes, you are a quick learner. you'll do good.
me: or i could walk into macdonalds and offer someone a million dollar loan to go with their big mac.
them: wow. you are able to think outside the box. you would prosper in this industry.

[i really should have up and left but i thought i'd play along. make a good blog entry after all]
me: so what's the commission structure like?
them: we tell you that when you sign up.
me: come on now. how am i supposed to sign up if i dont know what i'm being paid?
them: [talk talk in chinese] you see, the bank gives us 1% commission. say from five hundred sounsand, there five sounsand. make ten of those in a month...
me: ten of those is 5 million! i've got to find people willing to spend THAT much?
them:....yes...10 of those is fifty sousand. then you get thirty percent, which is 15 sousand.
me: and the 70%?
them: we keep it!
me: so i basically do your dirty work!
them: which job pays you 15 sousand a month entry level?

if you are still reading this, i cant believe you actually got this far. my job search continues!

Thursday, January 12, 2006 

limbo

Limbo comes from the latin limbus meaning a hem or an edge or a boundary. While "limbo" is often popularly understood to be a "place where souls go", the term also describes and reflects theological uncertainty. As such, limbo is not part of the Church's official doctrine (compare purgatory, which is). Official Church teaching remains that the status of these souls (who don't seem to deserve hell, yet cannot follow the divinely-revealed path to heaven) is in limbo – in other words, their fate cannot be determined by any but God.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006 

164 emails later....

i have clocked 164 emails in 40 hours. that includes going through website after website and seeing who would be interested in picking my brain. my search for an internship continues. i regret not being that serious about it during my semester. it was supposed to be easy. i'm tired and just want to eat some ice cream and watch the telly. i think i'll do that before i go completely bonkers. by the way, i really don't know what the fuss in pa was about with regards to my social security number application. i just walked in today and breezed through everything. maybe those rednecks in pa have something againest me. stupid old farts. ok, ice cream.

Sunday, January 08, 2006 

beam me up scottie

sometimes i wonder why i'm so stupid, or rather why i do stupid things. right, so on friday i made my way to airport to catch my flight back to northern cal. not very eventful. the same old boring city commute. i check myself in, nothing out of the ordinary then decide to head for the gates. as i approach airport security, i see people taking off their shoes, then suddenly it hits me: i'm wearing my lucky socks. that is, my big toe on my right foot is peeping out the gi-normous hole in my sock. oh shit! i can't turn back. it would look way too suspicious. i join the queue and my heart is racing. what do i do? as my turn fast approaches, my head starts spinning. how could i be so stupid? flashbacks of my mother advising me about clean underwear and good socks in case of an accident start haunting me. beam me up scottie!

i strategically place my bag in front of my foot as i take the shoe off, and quickly pull the sock over the toe, so as to conceal the eyesore. coup de grace! i think i may have saved myself. i casually empty my contents into the tub thingy, take my belt and watch off and proceed across the x-ray machine. me being me is constantly glancing at my foot to make sure the hole doesn't reappear. then, "would you like to step aside sir" - for crying out loud, beam me up scottie!

uncle sam was obviously watching my every move - suspicious moves at that too. and i was evidently nervous. they make me stand on the black square (this is in full view of everyone!) and proceed to frisk me. then the lady asks me to sit on this chair and lift my feet up! for goodness sake, beam me up scottie.

at this point, i was like, no-one here knows me, who cares, so i comply and she waves the x-ray thingy over my feet. as if that wasn't enough, the guy with her starts physically inspecting my socks. (i didn't come here for a foot massage!) at that point lucky sokisi had had enough as simply caved into the pressure. i remained calm and collected, it's just a sock for crying out loud. dont worry scottie, i survived!

 

$1.99

for less than 2 bucks, i bought this cd from a charity shop with some mad raves tunes which take me back to boarding school. being stuck at that school with 'those' kids corrupted me. [do i get m'salala points?] funny enough, i really like it. atb, faithless, darude......who remembers sandstorm? funny thing it that if you slow the tempo down a little (i have a cool program which does it), it sounds like decent house music.

[cd's on eternity by orion. i'll pretend i know them.]

 

dollar goes a long way

so i take the window seat on the number 2 bus from bel air to downtown LA. some stops later, this bulky woman, perfumed with stale urine and ten years of body odour, takes the seat next to me. i casually block my nose, try to breath in with my mouth. but the pong is so bad, i can taste it.

she then....wait for this.....she then asks me for a dollar. woman, you stink the whole bus out and have the cheek to ask me for money!! i ignore, but that smell.....that smell. nah nah nah! so i politely ask her to move a bit to let me out. what does she do? she ignores me! mnuko and all! she outright ignores me. there i was looking like a lost fart in a thunderstorm.

i reach into my pocket, fish out a dollar bill, hand it over to her and FREEDOM!!!

 

cool intentions

well, my undercover self, with the help of my crafty uncle, devised a plan to lobby my intelligent self into Caltech and UCLA. so i compiled my statement of intent, emailed it to the colleges and go invited for a "chat."

i'm really chuffed to say that it worked like a charm. besides the academic hogwash we went through, i got what i wanted: them to be able to recognise my name when it comes to selection time. i'm very confident at this stage with UCLA. i can already see myself there, slaving away for the cool three letters, phd! i think the only reason i want to torture myself so much that fact that it would be cool to be refered to as dr. i already look intelligent, i may as well get the tag!

Thursday, January 05, 2006 

drenched in hollywood

saturday greeted me with dark, gloomy skies!! southern cal does have it's dark days and i found myself drenched to the bone. okay, i saw the dark clouds looming and decided, wtf, i'm not being stuck indoors.

hang on, let me back track a bit. remember that guy i was dissing, that other uncle of mine who caused royally entertained us the other night - well, i'm staying with him and his family. so maybe, i should bite the hand that feeds me. (but eish, i've been in that bathroom way too many times and my stomach decides to rumbles in moments of silence!!). the other dude i came with just up and left and he's now back in nothern cal. i decided that my fun here just didn't happen with him cramping my style. need my freedom from peeps suffering from severe mid-life crises. anyhoo, this other dude (let's call him ben) put me in his garage which i thought was sweet. no need to sneak in early in the morning, worrying that they'll hear me. so i have my own little space with my own tiny wincy telly to keep me company.

anyway, i catch the metro for hollywood. i got off at highland - swike me, it really was a bit glamorous - except for the rain which was now peltering like mad. walking down hollywood blvd was like trying to swim through the limpopo. it was pouring. but there i was, no umberalla in hand, blissfully admiring the stars on the sidewalk. just like the ones i see on tv. then...

....finish later...

where was i?....sidewalk, rain. wet wet wet! it was like being in england all over again. it made me realise just how much i hate rain. but it was good to walk around the highland area. bumped into these holidaying south africans. "how you doin my bru?" "lekker, man!"

when i got back home, my garage was completely underwater!

Tuesday, January 03, 2006 

bit of a drag

excuse me for a while... i've soooo many entries long overdue. i was planning on spending at least two hous here in this here internet cafe on sunset blvd. lo and behold these drag queens have taken over and are shrieking like twelve year olds. what makes it worse is that these other dudes in here are playing along with them. oh nkosi yam! what would my gogo say. this land of the free is just way too free. i think i'll say my soul and catch a sun-downer on venice beach. with so much sun out there i really should be outdoors.

[oh nkosi yam, he/she/it is screaming "i'm coming!"]

for pity's sake grow a brain!

 

down wysteria lane

thursday last.

i did universal studios and got the whole hollywood experience. well, actually, if you factor in the time spent in the queues i really wonder why i bother. the old guy had been there lots of times and so he decided to pass - and there i was all on my own in the worlds biggest theme park!

it was fun though. the kid in me was unleashed and i fell into the candy floss trap - i found myself tapping away to the blues brothers! anyhoo, van helsing (didn't even see the movie!) was a real let down. i dont find fake skeletons and people in weird costumes particularly scary. however i ha d the opportunity of getting my arm chopped off in the special effects studio. it was really cool - seeing the blood gush out. they also killed me... but my ghost still lives on!

Of note was the studio tour. that's a must see for anyone. actually got to see when they actually shoot some movies and tv shows. even went down wysteria lane! it seemed so real and yet so surreal.... much enjoyed